Embrace Infinity: Twin Flame Unconditional Love

The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new. 

~Socrates

Embrace Infinity

This post is based upon the many messages I received this past weekend while on a retreat of solitude at the beach this past weekend, as well as over the week since I exposed my truth to my TF. I say "exposed" because I realized that I had been keeping in my true emotions, fearing that if I were to say "I love you," he'd run fast and furiously away from me, never to return. In a letter, I expressed to him all of the gifts that he has given me through lessons of unconditional love. From the moment I left the letter at his house for him to read later, I've felt this enormous shift of energies. I've felt lighter, more blissful, more at peace, more in tune to the energy of the universe. Many of us imagine that exposing our inner most desires, thoughts or feelings would be a scary and painful process. It is! But, after having purged those desires, thoughts and feelings about your TF relationship, I felt as though I did the right thing. I now know that everything I wrote in the letter was divinely inspired and that spirit walked me through what to say so that each thing I said truly resonated with my TF. 

First, I'll dive into the letter and then I'll explain a few insights I gained over the weekend. I decided to write a letter to my TF and give it to him because I realized that we both take-in information and express it in a complimentary fashion. I can write; he speaks. But I can listen; he reads. Take away an insight there, too, that your TF may respond differently to different forms of communication. Only you can decide how best to express your truth, and if you do so from the heart, you can never go wrong. The letter described how I can see his inner struggle between his identities--the ego self which denies the pleasure and fulfillment of love because he's been programmed through his youth and previous relationships with women that he doesn't deserve love, that women can't be trusted, that they'll hurt you in the end. His other self, his soul self, is always the one that I speak directly to. I say "always" because...I can't explain it, but that's the self that shows up when we're together! I see glimpses of his ego coming out at times, but when we're together, I see the beautiful soul self bubble to the surface and it stays there for me. Thus, it makes me sad for him when I see this conflict occur, when I see his shift between the blissful evenings we spend together and then his hardened, protective ego energies navigate his attitude during the light of day (or during the work week, for example). It's as though his soul self only comes out at night, that it's 'let out' under the guise of shadow and moonlight.

In the letter, I also expressed that I can see his inner light and his inner power, and that I can see that others in his life have taken his power to shine away from him. They've somehow convinced him that he's not special, that his inner light is not a unique thing to celebrate. But oh, my loves, it is. It truly is. As Marianne Williams puts it most beautifully:

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

All of us are unique and beautiful. Yet, at the same time, we are the same and unspecial. The paradox is that in our sameness, we appreciate that we are no better than the person sitting next to us. Yet, at the same time, we are all unique and experiencing the infinite nature of the universe as unique human bodies. It's a true miracle when you think about it! We are the same, but also unique. We are made of the same physical "stuff," but our DNA proves us to be unique down to the atomic level. What an incredible thing! 

I'll get back to the letter and lessons learned. In final thoughts of the letter, I likened my love for him to that of one who sits in Perpetual Adoration in the Catholic faith. The Adoration is a ritual whereas the alter of the sacrifice Jesus made and promise of eternal life. It's about forgiveness and holding dear the beautiful gifts we've been given in this lifetime--particularly the gift to live this life and learn the lessons we were meant to learn. Thus, the insight I received through writing this letter was that of unconditional love. True, authentic unconditional love. 

Both the letter and this past weekend helped me realize the infinite nature of unconditional love. You see, unconditional love is not something to be possessed. It's not something you have to control. Instead, it's something to be adored, to be appreciated, to accept as a gift in itself. The ability to love someone unconditionally may be the ultimate lesson for you to learn at this time with your TF. All of the sudden, I now see that trying to reach my TF by text, phone, or by running into him was all an act of the ego. I was desperately trying to call him back into my life because I feared that he would be gone forever--fears of abandonment and rejection played a large part of my desire to be with him. 

A few weeks ago, I read a blog about a person who said that they'd given away their desire to be with their TF and that they were blissfully happy simply having found love for their TF. I thought: "Holy shit, you are CRAZY! How could you deny yourself the pleasure of being with your TF in the physical and just love them from the spirit?!" Then, it happened to me. 

This weekend spent in solitude taught me that all this time, I was coming into my own power as the divine feminine. The DF is meant to nurture love, to provide it space to rest, grow, to be taken care of. We draw in energy not to wield it as a power--like many of us use love in conditional, 3D relationships--we draw in energy to appreciate it and nurture it for its divine nature. Nothing more, nothing less. We understand that, like a child who grows up beyond its mothers' care, the love cannot be claimed as our own--it must be allowed to flow back out into the universe so that it can reach its own full potential. 

If we release the desires to hold onto our TF, then we also give unto ourselves the power to behold life and its infinite possibilities as well, without attachment. This is what this is all about! I can say that within my TF, I can love myself. I love myself in and through him. I love him in and through me. And just as I would forgive myself for my past misdeeds, for the times I could've been more responsible or thoughtful, I forgive him for perhaps not understanding how to embrace unconditional love for his own understanding. 

As the Divine Feminine, I can hold heart space for my Divine Masculine and adore him, appreciate him, nurture him, and set him free with love. He is the sun shining down upon me. He is the warmth upon my face. He is the mirror that tells me that I don't have to be afraid of love anymore. He is the strength that guides me to treat everyone else as though I am interacting with my TF--with love. With ultimate love.

Can I tell you what else happens when you "let go" and experience unconditional love? You bring more love back to you! It's almost as though I've found this amazing well of inner peace that is deep and unexplored. I'm starting to see human interaction in the ego sense and not letting egoistic behavior upset me. I'm starting to see that others see the light in me. It's as though this love energy has made me a magnet for others--even strangers! Try emulating your love and light energy to everyone around you, despite how they treat you, and see what happens! It's incredible!

So, my loves, the lesson here is that conditional love operates on a lower level of understanding and vibration, as it considers expectations that you want your beloved to fulfill. By pining away for your TF to return, you are subconsciously putting expectations onto them that they don't need right now. The universe will take care of you! That is not to say that if you have things that needed to be said to your TF that you should hold back. Meditate on those words. Write them down--several times! Then, if you feel compelled to communicate, make sure you come from heart space and consider how they may respond or best consume this information for their highest good.

I have to say that, another realization occurred, when I made peace with my love, my emotions and my truth. The realization was that I thought I was allowing for him to lead the process of opening hearts, of opening our relationships. But he wasn't--I was! I was operating in 3D for much of our relationship, hoping that he would seek me out to spend time with me, and I gave up my own DF power in that belief. Instead, I started to realize that whenever I opened up to my truth (I have these moments that I call my "compulsory truth-telling"...I'm a Sagittarius, I can't help it! I'm blunt!), I allowed for space for him to explore his feelings as well. It was as though I opened up the door and propped it open for him, allowing for him to walk through behind me. Yet, now instead of hoping he walks in behind me, I have faith that he will simply walk whatever path he was meant to walk so that he can attain his own power as a Divine Masculine.

Finally, I want to bring up a moment that for me was a culmination of synchronicities this past weekend. You see, the whole way to the beach, I began to allow myself to notice synchronicity through numbers, quotes I saw when I was thinking about him, songs I heard, even billboards! It was incredible how much I knew/felt the universe was guiding me! Later that evening, I remember sitting outside and looking at the stars and marveling at the crescent moon in its waxing splendor. In that moment, my heart felt as though it was expanding into the universe and I felt my TF's love so powerfully. It was like a warm blanket covering me in love. Even though my TF and I are not necessarily in contact right now, I still texted him, and it was a simple, heartfelt, true message. It just said, "I miss you."

Not expecting anything back, I was happy that I sent out that sentiment into the universe. It was a truth. A mere truth. Yes, we were together in that moment, but I wanted him and his 3D/4D self to know that I was still loving him and appreciate his presence. I needed to say it as much as he needed to hear that, I know this now. And when I woke up in the morning, I saw that he had texted back 3 beautiful words: "Miss you too." When you read your TF's words, you know how they feel when they wrote them, the true message that they're sending you. And he was telling me that he misses me, he longs for me, he's getting his life in order to be with me. I know it. I feel it in my bones. I feel it in my soul.

My message to you is that living in unconditional love is also living in your truth--in setting the love free to flow among all places and spaces that it was meant to flow. I am sending love into the universe for you, for my TF, but mostly, for me and my divine spirit. Adore this love; it's the truest love that there is.